A lesson in believing

In preparation for next week’s “Dreamboarding” workshop with Writer’s Block Philippines, my “writing sisters” Ana and Nikka, and I, made our first-ever dreamboards for the year. I like how mine turned out because of the colors, the images, and the words that I found, and as I worked on it and processed my own thoughts and feelings about the year ahead, one key word kept popping up:

BELIEVE.

It then struck me that some of the “trauma” that I had sustained from some major downfalls in 2011 have really scarred me deeply–enough to paralyze me with fear, enough to make me doubt my capacity to achieve what I had set out to do, enough to make me think less of myself and my dreams. In the weeks leading up to that exercise, I had been scarred and broken, I had been frightened and paralyzed, I had been reduced to fear and worry and anxiety and doubt.

It wasn’t a good way to start the year.

So here my dreamboard was, telling me to BELIEVE again–to believe in myself and my capabilities, to believe enough in my dreams to make them real, to believe that I would find or create the opportunities to build and design the lifestyle that works for me, to believe that my goals are possible… that ANYTHING is possible.

Believe in yourself first. Believe that you have enough to achieve what you’d like to achieve this year. Believe that the Universe will conspire in your favor and help you any way it can.

My first test came the very next day, when I came to meet with someone very important to me about a major decision that I was about to make. I was tense, anxious, unsure of myself, and, in general, acting out of fear. Fear of going through what I went through in 2011, fear of loss, fear that opportunities will not pass my way… fear, fear, fear. (Although, of course, I was trying very hard to look sure of what I was doing and saying.)

He must have seen it all on my face because the next few minutes that unfolded were, to me, a miracle. He said everything that I needed to hear–not just about the subject of our discussion, but about ME and why I wanted to do the things that I wanted to do. Like a true friend and mentor, he drew out the things that mattered to me and showed me why I had to take the path that had been laid out for me. Most of all, he showed me the value of what I was meant to do and why I shouldn’t give up on certain dreams. He made me see myself differently again–close to the way I used to–and made me believe again that anything was possible.

That changed everything. In a matter of minutes, I felt like a tremendous weight had been lifted off my shoulders and like the world had suddenly changed for me–or, perhaps, changed back to how it really should have been. I started seeing things in color again and I started to see my dreams come back to life. Most important of all, I saw that I didn’t have to change who I was or the path I was on in order to fulfill other dreams that I had laid out for myself and my loved ones.

It’s an amazing feeling to know that there are people who believe enough in you to make you believe more fully in yourself. If I could bottle up that feeling and share it with the world, I would.

In the meantime, I’m sharing with you a sneak peek of my dreamboard and would once again like to invite you to our Dreamboarding workshop on Tuesday, January 10, 6-9 PM at Quantum Cafe (Bagtikan corner Kamagong Streets, Makati City). Read THIS for more information, or email writersblock.ph@gmail.com.

Dreamboard 2012
One side of my first dreamboard for 2012. These are my priorities for myself, for this year

If you’ve already made dreamboards for the year and would like to share comments or links to your blog posts, feel free to share them here! Let’s make 2012 a year for believing in, first and foremost, OURSELVES. 🙂

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